I still remember everything like it was yesterday. The sights, the smells, my fear. It all happened so fast and I had no place to run.
When I was 16 years old I tragically lost a best friend to suicide. Being so young and naive I was instantly set into a downward spiral. The many nights with strange boys. Getting close but always backing out. Not caring what happened. Until one day I decided enough was enough. I stopped cold turkey for a year, BUT and then it started again. At this point I was 19.
But this guy was different—I trusted him. He was there for me when my friend died, he knew me. We went to high school and church together. I thought I could trust him. He came to my house he sat at my kitchen table with my family.
It WAS just like any other night. We were at my best friend's boyfriend's house and the four of us were playing games. My parents being OVERPROTECTIVE like normal called me and told me to come home. I assured them I was safe and having a good time and would be home soon.
We left later than I thought and he proceeded to take me to my house. I decided not to go and drive around a little more instead. We drove to a parking lot and we started making out. That's when the questions happened. "Can we have sex?" "can I put in your butt?" I said no. The whole time i was saying no.
He proceeded to start undressing me anyway. I was scared and worried and told him to stop. No, I didn't want this. It happened anyway. It took me crying out in pain for him to stop. On the drive home he told me he loved me. I felt so sick and dirty.
I contacted the police the next day. I had a rape kit, pictures, a statement. He even confessed to doing it, But the case was never prosecuted.
I was upset at first, but through therapy I can finally say I forgive him. And I am a better person today than ever.